Monday, September 19, 2011

Dirty Deeds... done really expensive

If you have been through Times Square or follow the boxing universe you know that this weekend was the much-hyped Mayweather-Ortiz fight.

I am by no means a fan of boxing. I don't follow it. I don't know who certain people are. And watching someone end up with their face looking like they were stung by an entire hive? Yea, not really on my STD list. And by STD I mean Stuff To Do...pervert. 

In any event the boy toy had plans to go to his friends to watch the fights and wanted me to go. It's not as if I had plans so I went. Actually, I suppose those were my plans for the night seeing as how he asked me to go with him a week earlier. In any event, I went.

As I said, I am by no means a fan of boxing. That being said, I fucking loved watching the fights! I'm sure my hostile nature had something to do with this but still. Boxing and me? I never even considered the option of such a love affair. I still don't think I'll become a fan, but I'm down with some glove to face action.

And now for the main event. Fortunately for me I was schooled on who Mayweather and Ortiz were (thanks to the boy toy) so I wasn't completely in the dark. Mayweather is a cocky sonbitch who has clearly let his fame and money feed his black-cock sized ego. This dude is pretty in love with himself. Although, if I made 50 mil to punch someone in the face I would might think highly of myself to. And I suppose he does have the stats to back up said penis-like ego. The guy is undefeated. Ortiz on the other hand is much more modest and I found myself liking him. (Plus he's kind of cute in that random-guy-on-the-street kind of way). He wasn't flashy and obnoxious.

Mr. Announcer Man spoke his famous line (seriously? I wish I got paid to say one simple sentence.) and we were ready to go. I figured the first 2-3 rounds would be boring. Maybe a punch here and there but more or less just feeling each other out. Fourth round came about and to put it in street slang, "shit popped off!" (Sadly, I understand this term even though I think it's stupid.) While Ortiz was laying into Mayweather he inadvertently headbutted him which is illegal and he automatically loses a point (still lost on the whole scoring concept, will learn.) Ortiz knew he was in the wrong and apologized, to the tune of a hug and cheek kiss. Fine. They're back in the center of the ring, they touch gloves, the ref is talking to someone off camera (judges? scorekeepers? No idea, I'm still new here), Mayweather throws 2 punches and the next thing I know Ortiz is on his ass and the fight is over. A couple of things here:
  1.  Mayweather obviously threw those sucker punches as retaliation for the headbutt;
  2. The ref had this funny look on his face as if he'd never seen someone get punched in the face before; and
  3. The idea of whether or not the fight was officially "back on" is somewhat up for debate (at least to me).
Suckerpunches they were. Fair they were not. The dude apologized. That should be enough and it should have been forgotten. Mr. Cocksmith apparently had other plans. From what I gather the punches were legal because they had touched gloves and the fight was "back on". Where I'm hopping on the fence is that the ref wasn't paying attention at all at the time. How is the fight good to go when the ref isn't even ready?

In any event this little spectacle has renewed my taste (read: affliction) for blood and I'm pretty excited to watch another one. Maybe I'll even start following someone! Nah... that would make me a fan.

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