November 23, 2011

Gobble It Up

It's official. The holidays are on us like that fat man in the airplane seat next to you. Try as you might to make yourself comfortable and keep your distance he just creeps into your space. Personally, I'm not one for turkey day. Don't get me wrong, I intend to be the Glutton Princess I am and reign over my plates (yea, plates...) and bask in my food coma glow. But this particular holiday? Ain't no thaaang.

Today, following work, I'll be making a mad dash to Port Authority to catch a Greyhound bus to transport me the 184 miles to my parents house. According to Google, it takes 3 hours and 28 minutes which I doubt. I've made the drive myself countless times and it's closer to 3 hours. Although that's probably because I drive like I'm qualifying for NASCAR. Seeing as how I'm excited  dumb due to go home, I'm taking comfort in the fact that I have the next 3.5 days to be completely obligation free. I intend to do nothing more than wreak havoc in my teenage siblings' lives, eat, and maybe play a game of football. You know, to um.. work off the mashed spuds and all...

Still, in the spirit of the day of promoted fatness I give you Fun Facts About Thanksgiving.

Some of the ones I found most interesting:

z     Sarah Josepha Hale, an American magazine editor, persuaded Abraham Lincoln to declare Thanksgiving a national holiday. She is also the author of the popular nursery rhyme "Mary Had a Little Lamb"

z     It was Abraham Lincoln that slated Thanksgiving as the fourth Thanksgiving of November. In 1939 President Franklin Roosevelt moved Thanksgiving up a week in the hope that it would move up the Christmas shopping season and be fruitful to retailers. The move was proven to be very unpopular and it was changed back two years later.(if only he could see what he started!)

z     Californians are the largest consumers of turkey in the United States.

z     Each year, the average American eats somewhere between 16 - 18 pounds of turkey.

z     Turkey has more protein than chicken or beef.

z     A 15 pound turkey usually has about 70 percent white meat and 30 percent dark meat.

So friends, put on those fat pants and eat until you pass out, enjoy the family time, chaotic as it may be, and have a fun day!


  1. I don't understand why we call it "Turkey Day." For me, it's all about the mashed potatoes and gravy.

  2. Hope you have a great one, and that the bus ride isn't too painful.

    We did ours back in October, but I hope you enjoy your turkey coma.


  3. And they laughed at me for wearing fat pants. They mocked my spandex waist band. But who's laughing now, fat-uncle-that-just-had-to-unbutton-the-top-button-of-his-pants?