Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Forgiveness

Day 7: Forgiveness - Who have you forgiven this year and what was the journey like that brought you to forgive them?

This past year I don't think there was anyone specific that I forgave. However, I did I forgive myself.

If you've been reading for the past few months then you know that I am incredibly hard on myself regarding school. I'm not going to rehash it all because it's something I am finally coming to terms with. I'm not completely at peace over it, but I'm getting there.

In 2009 I made the conscious effort to lose weight. I was 40 pounds overweight and I was miserable. It was a lot of hard work but within 8 months I lost all of it and I felt amazing. In the past 2.5 years 15 of it has come back. Although I am going back to making changes to lose it I no longer beat myself up over certain things. I have thick thighs and it used to drive me crazy to wear shorts or having them exposed in a bathing suit. This year I just said F it. They're muscular with about an inch of padding and there's nothing wrong with that. I have since decided that I love my thighs (boyfriends comments of adoration help too) and I've never been more comfortable in my own skin. Even though I want to get back to where I used to be, I don't look in the mirror and get angry or cry in my closet about having nothing to wear.

Forgiving others for their misdeeds is important. And as essential as forgiving others is, I think it's even more important to be able to forgive ourselves.

2 comments :

  1. Ummm.. "This past year I don't think there was anyone specific that I forgave..."

    You are the most important one of all. You are very specific, Missy!

    I applaud your acceptance. It's hard, but at a certain point, it's like "Really? Do I really want to keep bashing myself over and over when I am really quite fine?"

    It takes MUCH more work and is MUCH harder to forgive yourself, no doubt.

    So kudos to you.
    I am getting closer, but I flip flop between moments of strength and self-acceptance, and moments of sheer self-hatred.

    I'm hoping that I change that BS soon!

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  2. Ugh. Thin legs gross me out. They really do. Don't wear high heels if you have stick legs, ladies. You look like you're about to fall over and break your toothpick shins.

    The point of all that? THICK THIGHED LADIES UNITE! Good for you for embracing your gorgeousness.

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