Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Dear Black Friday

Hey there favorite non-holiday holiday of the year! I'm excited you'll be here in 2 short days but there are a few things I think we need to discuss first.

Mainly, how irritated I am with you.

We used to have such great times frolicking about at 3am dashing and prancing from Kohl's to Target to Walmart based on who had what and who opened when. Mom and I would sit down after Thanksgiving dinner and map out our plan of attack. we'd make our lists, check them twice and have a game plan for each and every store. We even scheduled in breakfast.

I used to believe this...

Then something happened. You got a taste of popularity. Regina George let you sit with them and then, then you became plastic. 

Look, I'm just going to come out and say it. 

Black Friday, you have stopped being fun.

You've forgotten your roots and you're overstepping your boundaries. Thursday is NOT your day. It's for turkey and leggings. Your expertise is 12am Friday. Not 8. Not 6. And most certainly not 5pm.  Yeah, I'm looking at you Toys 'R Us. You should be ASHAMED of yourselves. 

I'm disappointed in you. You went from a day I looked forward to all year to a day I've started to dread. Who told you you could start at 6pm? Just because Target and Kohl's are being bullied encouraging you doesn't mean it's ok. Stop trying to be a day you're not. Be Friday. 

You wanted to be liked, was that it? I promise people liked you. But now, you've become a monster. You're taking people from their families on the ONLY day of the year that isn't a slave to commercialism. But you're trying. You're trying to convert Thursday so that you become some 48-hour spectacular. Fetch is never going to happen! And on top of that you're allowing people to see your ads early?! Those were the golden ticket of the Thursday paper! You've changed, and not for the better.

Get it together.


  1. I feel the same way. Black Friday should NOT be happening on Thursday! It's just ridiculous :/

  2. This is why I'm going to Paramus on Friday...Blue laws are actually not so bad!!! Don't have to get there at 2am, still get all the sales...booyah!