July 27, 2015

That Time I Got Kicked Off the Beach AND Out of a Bar

I don't understand how Monday comes so quickly. This 5:2 work week really isn't working for me. Why can't we adopt a 4:3 rule? Honestly, I think the masses would be much happier with one more day. Speaking of happy...

Last week was such an emotional drain for me. Thank you to all of you who offered support, commiseration, and suggestions regarding facing facts. I'm not sure where I'm headed next, and no I didn't quit my job...yet.

I don't typically do weekend recaps but this time I think a mini one is warranted. On Saturday the Blogger's Beach Day took place and Alyssa, Jenn, Dani and I all got together to spend some time in the sun and sand down the shore. Jenn is amazing! You guys, she drove up from Delaware. I heart her for that alone.

I'm sure someone else will recap Saturday's events more eloquently that I can, but let's just say that apparently we're a bunch of rowdy bitches who laugh in the face of authority and get kicked off beaches for following orders.

When you go down the shore, you always bring a cooler of some sort. It's just law. So that happened. When you go to Tiki Bar, you stand in a conveyor line to have your ID checked, scanned, and then your bag checked. Any "illegal" items, you know, like a bag of PopCorners, or a water bottle,  are quickly confiscated. However, when you bring a 6-pack of beer {illegal}, 3 water bottles {illegal}, and a sheathed steak knife that's okay!

We all get a drink at the bar and then post up on the beach. Jenn got there first and picked a great spot. We set up, drinks are drank, laughs are had, conversation flows.

Fast forward to an empty beer can sitting by my beach bag. In full disclosure, I, or I should say we, because none of us actually thought about it, left it uncovered. All of a sudden Captain Douchebag {and his sidekick Tyler} comes over with his overly authoritative loudness and tells us "how it's gonna be". We had 2 options:

a) We search your stuff, take anything you have, cut off your bracelets, you're cut off for the day, and you can enjoy yourselves;


b) you can pack up now and leave.

We went with option a because we had just bought our third round so really, whatever dude. Maybe an hour later the nicer of the duo returns to tell us that "typically we give people 30 seconds to get their stuff and leave" but they were being nice by allowing us to finish the round that had arrived during confiscation but "you ladies need to leave". Excuse me??? I promise you that we all had something to say about this. Mainly, that's not what we were told.

The fun part about this second interaction was that Dani was up in the bar to use the restroom. The rest of us decided we'd finish our drink when we finished it because F that. We paid to get in, yes we broke a rule, but we had already bought several rounds and were planning on buying more, plus food. Not to mention not one of us was rowdy, loud, or disrespectful to others.

Maybe 15 minutes later, #2 of the dynamic duo returns with some other superior who tells us we need to leave right now. We explained that our friend had gone to use the bathroom and we were waiting for her to get back. Nope. She was basically being detained from returning to the beach to collect her things. So in true asshole form I took my time folding up my beach blanket and packing up my stuff. When you're being personally escorted off a beach and out of a bar, you take your damn time.

If you caught me breaking a rule, you-1; me-0. I get it. You're doing your job. Here's the thing: be fucking nice about it! You don't need to be a douchebag and talk to us like we're trash just because we broke a rule. We complied with your request the first time you made it. Then you reneg on the options because someone "upstairs" {seriously, Tyler said this} won't like that we're still here. Oh, I'm sorry. Did you just realize you lost money by taking the bracelet so now you need to kick us out? 

Fun fact: Tyler took this picture... pre-kick out
Takeaways of the day:

a) like mother like daughter;
b) we're rowdy bitches;
c) there's a first time for everything; and
d) if you want to get kicked off a beach and out of a bar sometimes, you know where to fine me.

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